One of the most telling things that exposes the true feelings of a person is their body language. In fact, whenever I have the opportunity to go and hear a preacher, the first thing I do is identify his wife and watch her for awhile. You see, I've been a Minister's wife for nearly 30 years so I've gotten to know a lot of ministry wives and I've become familiar with the kind of body language they use around their husbands and when they are sitting in the pew listening to their husbands. I'm not a body language expert, but I am pretty intuitive-a gift from God, I guess- and I can pick up alot just by watching a person. It's not rocket science ladies. We should watch our body language. What do you do when in a discussion with church members and your husband says something you don't agree with? Do you open your mouth and openly disagree? Do you roll your eyes, put your hands on your hips or make a face? When you are at odds with your hubby (which should never happen on a Sunday morning because you never let the sun go down on your anger, right?) do you look away from him or look down when he's in the pulpit? It only makes sense that if we, as Pastor's wives, know to watch other Pastor's wives, congregation members know enough to watch us.
I'm not advocating being a Stepford wife or your hubby's yes man. I'm not advocating being hypocritical. What I am advocating is common sense, support of your husband, and prudence in dealing with your husband when you don't agree or at odds. You see, if you communicate displeasure or frustration in front of members, you are opening the door for disrespect to develop. This makes ministry much more difficult. We all know our husband's weaknesses, dislikes, and failings but just as we hope that our husbands don't expound on ours from behind the pulpit, we should not communicate his when in front of the pulpit.
When my hubby and I disagree about something concerning ministry, I always, always, always concede to his way of thinking. You see, he is the Pastor, not me. He is the one God has gifted to lead, not me. He is the one God speaks to, for the most part, about the church. At best, I maybe expand his area of thought or act as confirmation, but ultimately I am not the Pastor, he is.
I often think of the Proverbs 31 woman. Her husband was a man in a position that required and demanded respect. Part of the reason that he was so well respected had to do with the character and actions of his wife. She "did him good" and "his heart trusted" in her. Only a man worthy of respect would have chosen a woman like her. Only a woman of impeccable character would shine so brightly that her glow would warm and illumine the good character of her husband as well.
I'm not advocating being a Stepford wife or your hubby's yes man. I'm not advocating being hypocritical. What I am advocating is common sense, support of your husband, and prudence in dealing with your husband when you don't agree or at odds. You see, if you communicate displeasure or frustration in front of members, you are opening the door for disrespect to develop. This makes ministry much more difficult. We all know our husband's weaknesses, dislikes, and failings but just as we hope that our husbands don't expound on ours from behind the pulpit, we should not communicate his when in front of the pulpit.
When my hubby and I disagree about something concerning ministry, I always, always, always concede to his way of thinking. You see, he is the Pastor, not me. He is the one God has gifted to lead, not me. He is the one God speaks to, for the most part, about the church. At best, I maybe expand his area of thought or act as confirmation, but ultimately I am not the Pastor, he is.
I often think of the Proverbs 31 woman. Her husband was a man in a position that required and demanded respect. Part of the reason that he was so well respected had to do with the character and actions of his wife. She "did him good" and "his heart trusted" in her. Only a man worthy of respect would have chosen a woman like her. Only a woman of impeccable character would shine so brightly that her glow would warm and illumine the good character of her husband as well.
RSS Feed
